Had our first play off game last night. If we lost we were done and if we won we would go on to play for the Championship on Sat. We lost. BUT.......It was a game and a half. Both teams played REALLY well. We were within 2 for most of the game. Brad says "It was a defensive battle". :-)
I can really see how Jack improved from when we started to now. He cried twice on the court. Once when he had the ball and was picked up by a kid by the ball. And the other - I'm not sure what he was upset about. It bothers Bill a LOT - but I can see he's trying to work it out. He's staying on the court - he's trying to get back into the game - he's just got tears. I think he'll get it under control. Plus, his coach assured me he has a HUGE heart - that he had the biggest heart on the team. Well, if tears come with that - I'll take it. I love that he has such a huge heart.
Sal did a GREAT job. She played UNO with her medals the whole game. She had brought her gold medal and bronze to show some of the people at Johnny Rockets (we had a school fundraiser there before the game) and when we got to the game she asked who could play UNO with her - I suggested her medals would play - the look on her face was so cute. Kind of like "that's kind of silly - but well, yeah - they could". So it she stayed out of our hair and no "how much longer" questions. I praised her and praised her when we were done.
On a serious note - Jack brought up going to college on the way home from practice the other night. I was just him and me and he asked what college he could go to. Then asked what college Sally would go to. I said that she may go to JJC. He decided that he should do that too - when I told him that he could go away to college he seemed concerned that he wanted to be with Sal. So I leveled with him that Sal going to college and him going were two entirely different things. I broke it to him that she would not be able to be a Dr or lawyer and yes - miracles do happen and things can change but we do have to face facts of the present right now. He was kind of taken back. I think he only saw her "handicap" in her behavior and not in her ability to learn. It saddened me and of course when he got out and went in the house I sat in the car and bawled. I felt like I had killed Santa for him. I remembered that little 2 year old telling us how Sally was his hero because she had found one of his toys that he lost.
On a happier tone = Sal had her IEP annual meeting this week. She's doing GREAT. I LOVE my team - and not just because they seem to love Sal. They work SO hard and are constantly evolving on how to reach and teach her. She's reading at a 2nd grade level and can tell time and money. We still need to work on counting change and knowing what you get back - but it's a start. As we've all known for a long time her understanding is WAY above her level of communication and even that's getting better.
Sally got to come into the meeting at the end and she just beamed! She loves school so much. We got approved for summer school - which we're ALL excited about. We also decided that she will transition into the "life skills" class in High School and since my team hasn't done this before they want to work very closely with us to get this done. Loving that!
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Saturday, March 05, 2011
Just Keep Swimming, Just Keep Swimming......
I'm so full of emotion I can hardly write. It's been an amazing day. Let me back up a couple to let you in on what's been up in our household lately.
I think when I last wrote it was a little down - one of those times in life when Special Needs becomes - well, not so special. More tiring. You get worn down, nerves get raw, the world seems to be celebrating and you're cleaning up poop - just prickly. Sal's kind of been coming into a toddler/teenage (they tell me the attitude is the same) thing. Screamy in the morning. ALWAYS picking on the brother in the morning (his most *favorite* time of the day) and in general being a royal pain in my arse. Bill wanted me to see about drugs to "calm her down" - but I really think it's a teen-age thing and, sadly, there are no drugs for teenagers(or their parents). So, I've honestly been white knuckling it through lately. We did the swim meet a couple of weeks ago and of course she qualified to go again this weekend.
We decided she could go by herself. The bus takes them all - they have a coach and aide and there's only 3 kids that go (and 2 go by themselves too). And YES I was feeling guilty. But not guilty enough to go with her. Jack had a basketball game and we've kind of neglected Jack in some of the sports things in favor of always being there for Sal....AND her coach assured me she would do great.
So today started off with a trip across town to put her on the bus by 8 am and then home to get a shower and take Jack to his game. Yes, the guilt was kicking in again because I was really looking forward to watching a game of Jack's without Sal in tow. Without having to say "only 4 minutes left" for 20 times. My brother and sister-in-law had kind of thought they might come and I was looking forward to finding out what's going on with their kids (one in Singapore, one just started basic training and one who is one of those "fat cat" teachers you hear about in the news - but THATs a whole 'nother post).
When I got back Bill decided he wanted to stay in bed - he's been sick the last 2 weeks and I think it finally caught up with him....SO Jack and I left and got to the game. Had a great time. Jack played very well, got to find out all the gossip of the family , Jack's team won and my brother even recorded the game and said he'd send it to Mom and Dad (I still have one of those OLD videos that does the VHS). So, I got home after the game and we called the swimming coach and found out that we had a couple of hours till the bus would be home. Bill and I got to sit and talk (I had dropped Jack off at a friend's) without any interruptions. I headed over to the Park District at the appointed time.
As I got to the bus, the coach, aide and Sal were all standing outside of it - oh oh. I no more got out than they shouted "She got a gold medal!" I think I said something like "you're kidding - no, she didn't".
Ok, that sounds harsh probably - but I did not expect that at ALL. 1. At the last meet Sal was 4 out of 5 kids. 2. There were to be more kids at this one because if you get gold you go to State.
I think it was when I saw the medal hanging on her neck and her coach saying how she swam faster than she ever saw her that I started crying. (and of course I'm crying now just thinking about it). Sal, of course was on to the next thing and was in the car before I could say thankyou to the staff and goodbye.
As we drove home I told her how proud I was of her. "You are?" She asked. "Mabel be proud too." she commented. I bawled all the way home and she kept looking at me like I was crazy. ;-)
When we got home she ran in saying "I won gold medal!" Bill was as stunned as I was and I do believe I saw a tear in his eye. "We go to Culvers?" she asked. Are you kidding? She could asked for a car and probably got it at that point. :-) We called Grandma and Grandpa, Aunts, Uncles, took pictures and posted them on facebook. As the night has gone on I've tried to figure out just why I'm so touched and emotional about this. I keep recalling two times in my life: 1. When the lady down the street told me about her Johnny who was in a home and got money for crushing cans and that he has made $2.25 one day and when I had rejoiced with her she said "Oh, I just knew *you'd* get it. All my other friends think don't get it. And the time when Jack was probably 3 or 4 and he stood in front of us with Sally standing behind and "read" (like kids do when they've heard the story so many times they know it by heart) to us. I remember thinking "how can I be happy when I know you're sister will NEVER do this".
So, tonight I "get it" again. Tonight his sister stands in FRONT. Tonight I see the HOPE. Tonight I have more faith and tonight I CELEBRATE.
And lastly - tonight I realize that I am holding her back. I may need to push a little more. Either that - or I have to sneak into things - so she doesn't know I'm there. :-)
I think when I last wrote it was a little down - one of those times in life when Special Needs becomes - well, not so special. More tiring. You get worn down, nerves get raw, the world seems to be celebrating and you're cleaning up poop - just prickly. Sal's kind of been coming into a toddler/teenage (they tell me the attitude is the same) thing. Screamy in the morning. ALWAYS picking on the brother in the morning (his most *favorite* time of the day) and in general being a royal pain in my arse. Bill wanted me to see about drugs to "calm her down" - but I really think it's a teen-age thing and, sadly, there are no drugs for teenagers(or their parents). So, I've honestly been white knuckling it through lately. We did the swim meet a couple of weeks ago and of course she qualified to go again this weekend.
We decided she could go by herself. The bus takes them all - they have a coach and aide and there's only 3 kids that go (and 2 go by themselves too). And YES I was feeling guilty. But not guilty enough to go with her. Jack had a basketball game and we've kind of neglected Jack in some of the sports things in favor of always being there for Sal....AND her coach assured me she would do great.
So today started off with a trip across town to put her on the bus by 8 am and then home to get a shower and take Jack to his game. Yes, the guilt was kicking in again because I was really looking forward to watching a game of Jack's without Sal in tow. Without having to say "only 4 minutes left" for 20 times. My brother and sister-in-law had kind of thought they might come and I was looking forward to finding out what's going on with their kids (one in Singapore, one just started basic training and one who is one of those "fat cat" teachers you hear about in the news - but THATs a whole 'nother post).
When I got back Bill decided he wanted to stay in bed - he's been sick the last 2 weeks and I think it finally caught up with him....SO Jack and I left and got to the game. Had a great time. Jack played very well, got to find out all the gossip of the family , Jack's team won and my brother even recorded the game and said he'd send it to Mom and Dad (I still have one of those OLD videos that does the VHS). So, I got home after the game and we called the swimming coach and found out that we had a couple of hours till the bus would be home. Bill and I got to sit and talk (I had dropped Jack off at a friend's) without any interruptions. I headed over to the Park District at the appointed time.
As I got to the bus, the coach, aide and Sal were all standing outside of it - oh oh. I no more got out than they shouted "She got a gold medal!" I think I said something like "you're kidding - no, she didn't".
Ok, that sounds harsh probably - but I did not expect that at ALL. 1. At the last meet Sal was 4 out of 5 kids. 2. There were to be more kids at this one because if you get gold you go to State.
I think it was when I saw the medal hanging on her neck and her coach saying how she swam faster than she ever saw her that I started crying. (and of course I'm crying now just thinking about it). Sal, of course was on to the next thing and was in the car before I could say thankyou to the staff and goodbye.
As we drove home I told her how proud I was of her. "You are?" She asked. "Mabel be proud too." she commented. I bawled all the way home and she kept looking at me like I was crazy. ;-)
When we got home she ran in saying "I won gold medal!" Bill was as stunned as I was and I do believe I saw a tear in his eye. "We go to Culvers?" she asked. Are you kidding? She could asked for a car and probably got it at that point. :-) We called Grandma and Grandpa, Aunts, Uncles, took pictures and posted them on facebook. As the night has gone on I've tried to figure out just why I'm so touched and emotional about this. I keep recalling two times in my life: 1. When the lady down the street told me about her Johnny who was in a home and got money for crushing cans and that he has made $2.25 one day and when I had rejoiced with her she said "Oh, I just knew *you'd* get it. All my other friends think don't get it. And the time when Jack was probably 3 or 4 and he stood in front of us with Sally standing behind and "read" (like kids do when they've heard the story so many times they know it by heart) to us. I remember thinking "how can I be happy when I know you're sister will NEVER do this".
So, tonight I "get it" again. Tonight his sister stands in FRONT. Tonight I see the HOPE. Tonight I have more faith and tonight I CELEBRATE.
And lastly - tonight I realize that I am holding her back. I may need to push a little more. Either that - or I have to sneak into things - so she doesn't know I'm there. :-)
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