A Lesson Learned

HOPELights From your child with special needs: "I want the same things you want. I wish I moved faster, wish I could catch up. Wish I could tell you what frustrates me. As lonely as it gets for you, it is for me too. But most of all I wish I could tell you how much I love you. I hope you feel this when you are near." HOPELights♥

 

Strange how some things come all at once.  Yesterday, when taking Sal to bowling, Tommy's mom stopped me.  (Sally calls this boy Thomas)  She told me how much Tommy liked Sal because Sally always talked to him.  Tommy is 11 and is non-verbal.  It made me realize that the thing I've been on edge about lately (her CONSTANT talking) is what is making this boy's life better.  Because Tommy is non-verbal most kids give up - thinking he's stupid or mad at them - you know, who wants to be the one to do all the talking.  Enter SALLY!  :-)  

On the ride home I kept thinking about this and it dawned on me that I didn't even ask Tommy's Mom what HER name was.  It's strange how we, as Special Needs parents kind of keep to our self.  As I thought back I realize that at swimming we all have our own little corners we retreat to.  We don't tend to form bonding friendships like other parents who attend sports with their children.  I wonder why that is. 

Anyway, when I got home the above blurb was waiting for me in my inbox.  I think we're all lonely - we, as parents have SO much going on that friendship is really a hard thing to take on sometimes.  Any relationship needs to be tended and I think we get so consumed with tending to our Special Needs kids that when we are alone - we welcome it - we relish in it - we don't want to take on anyone else's "stuff". 

This is why I'm so VERY thankful for JBSRA.  They take Sal and engage her and give me a break.  They cherish her as I do and thus *I* get a break, knowing that not only is she learning but also having a great time and being cared for by someone who has patience with her. 

This week has made me appreciate the thing that bugs the heck out of me about Sal.  I remember distinctly how MUCH I worried that she would never talk.  I imagined a very hard life for her when she couldn't get her needs met because she wouldn't be able to communicate.  Now I worry about other things.  Mostly, I pray that I will live just one day longer than she does.  :-)