Jack was in trouble last night. He had taken the wii controller to a friend's house after being told not to. He did the whole sneak thing and Sally told on him. :-) In his lecture, Bill tried to explain that what Jack did was actually stealing.
"Like, say you took a banana for instance." said Bill
"I wouldn't - because I don't like bananas." Jack interrupted.
Can you imagine how hard it was not to laugh out loud? :-) I just LOVE when Jack does stuff like that to Bill, because it's usually Bill doing this to me. :-)
We hit the library yesterday to get the book "I May Be Wong, But I Doubt It" by Charles Barkley. Sally has a report due on Thursday for Black History. I'm afraid I'm really having a hard time making "Sir Charles" a historical figure. He's in the news just recently for a DUI. So tell me how I spin *that*. I do hope I get a good grade. :-)
Sal had a ball at the library. She's like me - that whole huge expanse of books is just such a great feeling.
Well, off to work - to a nice quiet office where things stay in their place. "Just like heaven."
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
Oh, the Fun!
Sally had her last basketball game this weekend (unless her and I go to State). Mrs L and Mrs B attended and Sally just LIT up when she saw them!!!! When and if you talk about public school teachers - come sit by me and let me tell you how WRONG you are!!!
Sal has picked Charles Barkley as her Black History project and though I'm very sure "Sir" Charles is a lovely human being in person - I'm not finding all that much that *I* find historical about him. I mean, he's a lot like most of us - didn't make his HS team and fought back plus fought his weight and stature all his life. But he, himself, said that sports players should not be role models and I have to agree with him.
I found he has spit on people (not that they didn't deserve it ) and I'm not sure THAT's a real piece of history. He only went to college for 3 years. Again - not the best influence for a report. Just recently he rec'd a DUI and has announced that he will run for Governor of Alabama in 2014. Now IF he does become Governor - I do believe he will be the first African American to hold that office in Alabama. But other than than - I'm really not finding the big historical making stuff say like Harriet Tubman, Eli Whitney, Malcolm, heck even Harry Bontifelli. So, I'm not sure what Sal's going to speak on. Maybe we'll have to speak on the fact that we all make history, even in our bad behavior. ????
Jack is having some difficulty in school lately - nothing major - just some sliding grades and I think he's 1. rushing 2. pre-occupied and 3. lazy. So Daddy and I are going to nip that in the bud as best as we can starting tonight. He's not thrilled - but we explained that school is #1 and if he's needing a little help wrestling needs to come AFTER we get some practice done.
Day off today - it started at 5:45 a.m. Ugghhh. Why doesn't Sal get the meaning of "sleeping in?"
Sal has picked Charles Barkley as her Black History project and though I'm very sure "Sir" Charles is a lovely human being in person - I'm not finding all that much that *I* find historical about him. I mean, he's a lot like most of us - didn't make his HS team and fought back plus fought his weight and stature all his life. But he, himself, said that sports players should not be role models and I have to agree with him.
I found he has spit on people (not that they didn't deserve it ) and I'm not sure THAT's a real piece of history. He only went to college for 3 years. Again - not the best influence for a report. Just recently he rec'd a DUI and has announced that he will run for Governor of Alabama in 2014. Now IF he does become Governor - I do believe he will be the first African American to hold that office in Alabama. But other than than - I'm really not finding the big historical making stuff say like Harriet Tubman, Eli Whitney, Malcolm, heck even Harry Bontifelli. So, I'm not sure what Sal's going to speak on. Maybe we'll have to speak on the fact that we all make history, even in our bad behavior. ????
Jack is having some difficulty in school lately - nothing major - just some sliding grades and I think he's 1. rushing 2. pre-occupied and 3. lazy. So Daddy and I are going to nip that in the bud as best as we can starting tonight. He's not thrilled - but we explained that school is #1 and if he's needing a little help wrestling needs to come AFTER we get some practice done.
Day off today - it started at 5:45 a.m. Ugghhh. Why doesn't Sal get the meaning of "sleeping in?"
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Autism and advocacy: are parents always right?
Monday February 16, 2009
Just to get my week going with a bang, I thought I'd blog a bit about a subject that's been under my skin for quite a while. That is - the assumption by so many parents that mom and dad, because they ARE mom and dad, must know exactly what their child with autism needs. Not just in the ordinary way ("when Johnny sounds like that, it means he's hungry"), or even in the "mommy ears" way ("it's too quiet up there") but in a mystical way that's far beyond all ordinary powers of knowing.
Apparently, there are moms and dads out there who magically know that their child with autism needs biomedical intervention X, will only thrive after treatment from therapist Y, or must receive services in a particular setting with specialized equipment provided at great expense through agency Z. Their child receives these treatments or services and - only six months or a year later - develops extraordinary new abilities.
As a mom, I do know when my kids have been stressed too much. I can see a meltdown coming a mile away. And I can make a good guess when a topic or activity will be of special interest. I know what foods my kids like, and when they're too tired to do a good job with school work.
But over and over again, I'm surprised by my kids. And that's a GOOD thing!
I was surprised when I found that my son actually WAS willing and able to pick up a paintbrush and help to paint the set for the local production of Pirates of Penzance. I was amazed when he decided, based on the promise of a prize, to bowl one-handed through three entire games. I was impressed when he had an eye-opening conversation with his speech therapist - and shared things I'd never heard before.
Most importantly, I've been taken unawares by sudden developmental leaps. Suddenly, a boy who had never asked a question is wondering aloud why his sister seems so sad. Or where his toy frog has gone. Or whether we'll see his grandparents soon. Had I been right in the middle of trying a new therapy, I would have assumed that it was the therapy that made all the difference. But lucky for me, I've backed off on the therapies. And so, when Tom makes leaps, I know to whom the credit is due. It's due to... Tom.
Over the years, I've learned that there are many things a parent of a child with autism can and should advocate for. A solid academic education. Appropriate supports in school and in the community. Funding for treatments, education, respite, and adult care.
But when parents assume they're always right, I've found, limits are placed on the child, the therapists, and the possibilities. If only Dr. X can make a difference, Dr. Y never gets a chance to try. If only setting A is right, we'll never know if setting B could have been better. And if no one but mom and dad get to make choices for a child with autism, the child himself never gets to see what he can do on his own.
************************************************************************************
HOLY COW!!!! FINALLY A VOICE OF REASON!!!! Are we all listening??? Helllooooo??? All of you who are SO sure you know exactly HOW things should go and are SO certain that ______ (name the institution) is out to get you???????? This kind of logic goes to vaccines being the reason for ALL autistics - also goes out to Jenny M who is SO sure her child is *cured* now due to ________ (fill in whatever the newest thing coming down the pipe).
I've found there are TONS of variables - her mood, her development, the chemistry between her and whoever, (and sometimes SHE likes them and *I* don't and vice versa) , the time of day, week, year - you name it. I've resigned myself to the feeling that "the teacher comes when the student is ready" and to look at things with love, grace and common sense. I've also learned that it's OK to be #2 (or 3 or 4 or whatever) And the newest thing I'm trying very hard to teach Sal is it's OK - in fact preferable NOT to be perfect. To "go with the flow". That if someone makes a comment - that it's ok to not listen (that is - as long as they are not your teacher, aide, or parent) :-)
No, parents DON'T know everything - in fact, I've found that I know very little sometimes. One thing I have realized is that I DO know SOME "habits" of hers. And this fascinates Sal. I know when she has to use the bathroom and she always asks (as she's sitting on the potty) "How you know?" But aside from that - I know VERY little. Her and I are connected and there's times I get a little "tingle feeling" and find out later that something happened. I SO wish I could know what goes on in her head. Like for instance - why was she a monster yesterday at school? What made her not want to comply. Was it a specific thing? Or was it an independence thing?
Where's the owner's manual?
Monday February 16, 2009
Just to get my week going with a bang, I thought I'd blog a bit about a subject that's been under my skin for quite a while. That is - the assumption by so many parents that mom and dad, because they ARE mom and dad, must know exactly what their child with autism needs. Not just in the ordinary way ("when Johnny sounds like that, it means he's hungry"), or even in the "mommy ears" way ("it's too quiet up there") but in a mystical way that's far beyond all ordinary powers of knowing.
Apparently, there are moms and dads out there who magically know that their child with autism needs biomedical intervention X, will only thrive after treatment from therapist Y, or must receive services in a particular setting with specialized equipment provided at great expense through agency Z. Their child receives these treatments or services and - only six months or a year later - develops extraordinary new abilities.
As a mom, I do know when my kids have been stressed too much. I can see a meltdown coming a mile away. And I can make a good guess when a topic or activity will be of special interest. I know what foods my kids like, and when they're too tired to do a good job with school work.
But over and over again, I'm surprised by my kids. And that's a GOOD thing!
I was surprised when I found that my son actually WAS willing and able to pick up a paintbrush and help to paint the set for the local production of Pirates of Penzance. I was amazed when he decided, based on the promise of a prize, to bowl one-handed through three entire games. I was impressed when he had an eye-opening conversation with his speech therapist - and shared things I'd never heard before.
Most importantly, I've been taken unawares by sudden developmental leaps. Suddenly, a boy who had never asked a question is wondering aloud why his sister seems so sad. Or where his toy frog has gone. Or whether we'll see his grandparents soon. Had I been right in the middle of trying a new therapy, I would have assumed that it was the therapy that made all the difference. But lucky for me, I've backed off on the therapies. And so, when Tom makes leaps, I know to whom the credit is due. It's due to... Tom.
Over the years, I've learned that there are many things a parent of a child with autism can and should advocate for. A solid academic education. Appropriate supports in school and in the community. Funding for treatments, education, respite, and adult care.
But when parents assume they're always right, I've found, limits are placed on the child, the therapists, and the possibilities. If only Dr. X can make a difference, Dr. Y never gets a chance to try. If only setting A is right, we'll never know if setting B could have been better. And if no one but mom and dad get to make choices for a child with autism, the child himself never gets to see what he can do on his own.
************************************************************************************
HOLY COW!!!! FINALLY A VOICE OF REASON!!!! Are we all listening??? Helllooooo??? All of you who are SO sure you know exactly HOW things should go and are SO certain that ______ (name the institution) is out to get you???????? This kind of logic goes to vaccines being the reason for ALL autistics - also goes out to Jenny M who is SO sure her child is *cured* now due to ________ (fill in whatever the newest thing coming down the pipe).
I've found there are TONS of variables - her mood, her development, the chemistry between her and whoever, (and sometimes SHE likes them and *I* don't and vice versa) , the time of day, week, year - you name it. I've resigned myself to the feeling that "the teacher comes when the student is ready" and to look at things with love, grace and common sense. I've also learned that it's OK to be #2 (or 3 or 4 or whatever) And the newest thing I'm trying very hard to teach Sal is it's OK - in fact preferable NOT to be perfect. To "go with the flow". That if someone makes a comment - that it's ok to not listen (that is - as long as they are not your teacher, aide, or parent) :-)
No, parents DON'T know everything - in fact, I've found that I know very little sometimes. One thing I have realized is that I DO know SOME "habits" of hers. And this fascinates Sal. I know when she has to use the bathroom and she always asks (as she's sitting on the potty) "How you know?" But aside from that - I know VERY little. Her and I are connected and there's times I get a little "tingle feeling" and find out later that something happened. I SO wish I could know what goes on in her head. Like for instance - why was she a monster yesterday at school? What made her not want to comply. Was it a specific thing? Or was it an independence thing?
Where's the owner's manual?
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
It's been a while
In my defense, I have neglected my blog duties because the Oct 97 list has been migrating to facebook. So blame them. I've caught up with the girls who have been missing in action. Like, Laura - who I had no idea has chickens - real live chickens. :-)
Plus, for as good as Sal was as a baby - slept MOST of the time. Well, not so much anymore. She's really coming into the "talk back" "I know it all" "big fat boss" kind of kid. She's always demanding something, or talking back, or correcting or just in general being a regular pain in the arse. And then there's Jack. Who has ALWAYS been a pain. Thank God he's cute and at intervals really makes your heart melt because otherwise you'd kill the boy.
So life has been "sticky" for a while. There has been some good stuff. Sally met for #2 track practice yesterday and we were told she's VERY good at softball through and 50 meter. *I* thought she'd be good at running. Even though she's a chub she really has a nice, smooth, stride. Definitely NOT like her Mom. :-)
I've also noticed some things.: Dealing with Special Needs children - I REALLY hate to say it - but Jenny McCarthy is right about men detaching and woman over indulging. Ok, I admit she was right about one TINY thing - but otherwise - she's an idiot. :-)
Bill is running for School Board. He has some really great ideas and I realized last night that this is *his* way of *helping* Sally. Men help in ways that kind of take them away from the "dirty work". And that's not a bad thing - just different. Me - well, I don't even think of things that *I* want to do - oh, sure - there's the thought of an hour quiet time with NOTHING to do - no children no hub no laundry - that kind of thought - but as far as career or future goals - well, just getting her independent, surviving long enough to make sure she's ok and then trying to prepare her for me to be gone. Makes me tired just thinking about it.
The house is still crazy - Mabel is still alive, for the time being. She has taken to chewing shoes - and the thing that really corks me is that she gets them OUT of my shoe rack!!!! I've always let her slide on chewing things because - well, we don't pick things up well enough and she finds a LOT of things lying around. BUT - today she took the cake. I have a pair of old blue shoes that I haven't gotten around to throwing out yet - they are laying on the floor in the dining room. She took the brand NEW shoes (bought yesterday) out of my shoe rack and chewed them. I tried to explain to her that ruining shoes is the surest way for me to take her to Uncle Tim's farm and SOON! (Uncle Tim owns a gun) :-)
We refinanced today. When we got to closing we were informed that the bank that bought our mortgage stopped taking notes today. We're praying we disperse. Mr Dan didn't seem to be too worried - so we won't either. :-)
We have our last basketball game on Saturday. Sal's looking forward to it. I'm in the process of looking into getting Gma and Gpa to see a game at state. The only thing is that means ALL of us in a motel room. You know how Sal doesn't do quiet on command - I've slept with her when she was sick and it gets very much like a Bugs Bunny cartoon : "I be quiet" " I no talk" " I be quiet for you?" over and over and over. Till, just like Yosemite Sam you want to yell: "Shut up, shuttin up"!!!! So, we shall see how that goes.
We found out some friends have been laid off today. Makes my stomach hurt to hear of people in such dire straights. And the worst thing is there is so little hope. Bill and I are truly lucky to not loose our jobs.
Plus, for as good as Sal was as a baby - slept MOST of the time. Well, not so much anymore. She's really coming into the "talk back" "I know it all" "big fat boss" kind of kid. She's always demanding something, or talking back, or correcting or just in general being a regular pain in the arse. And then there's Jack. Who has ALWAYS been a pain. Thank God he's cute and at intervals really makes your heart melt because otherwise you'd kill the boy.
So life has been "sticky" for a while. There has been some good stuff. Sally met for #2 track practice yesterday and we were told she's VERY good at softball through and 50 meter. *I* thought she'd be good at running. Even though she's a chub she really has a nice, smooth, stride. Definitely NOT like her Mom. :-)
I've also noticed some things.: Dealing with Special Needs children - I REALLY hate to say it - but Jenny McCarthy is right about men detaching and woman over indulging. Ok, I admit she was right about one TINY thing - but otherwise - she's an idiot. :-)
Bill is running for School Board. He has some really great ideas and I realized last night that this is *his* way of *helping* Sally. Men help in ways that kind of take them away from the "dirty work". And that's not a bad thing - just different. Me - well, I don't even think of things that *I* want to do - oh, sure - there's the thought of an hour quiet time with NOTHING to do - no children no hub no laundry - that kind of thought - but as far as career or future goals - well, just getting her independent, surviving long enough to make sure she's ok and then trying to prepare her for me to be gone. Makes me tired just thinking about it.
The house is still crazy - Mabel is still alive, for the time being. She has taken to chewing shoes - and the thing that really corks me is that she gets them OUT of my shoe rack!!!! I've always let her slide on chewing things because - well, we don't pick things up well enough and she finds a LOT of things lying around. BUT - today she took the cake. I have a pair of old blue shoes that I haven't gotten around to throwing out yet - they are laying on the floor in the dining room. She took the brand NEW shoes (bought yesterday) out of my shoe rack and chewed them. I tried to explain to her that ruining shoes is the surest way for me to take her to Uncle Tim's farm and SOON! (Uncle Tim owns a gun) :-)
We refinanced today. When we got to closing we were informed that the bank that bought our mortgage stopped taking notes today. We're praying we disperse. Mr Dan didn't seem to be too worried - so we won't either. :-)
We have our last basketball game on Saturday. Sal's looking forward to it. I'm in the process of looking into getting Gma and Gpa to see a game at state. The only thing is that means ALL of us in a motel room. You know how Sal doesn't do quiet on command - I've slept with her when she was sick and it gets very much like a Bugs Bunny cartoon : "I be quiet" " I no talk" " I be quiet for you?" over and over and over. Till, just like Yosemite Sam you want to yell: "Shut up, shuttin up"!!!! So, we shall see how that goes.
We found out some friends have been laid off today. Makes my stomach hurt to hear of people in such dire straights. And the worst thing is there is so little hope. Bill and I are truly lucky to not loose our jobs.
Monday, February 09, 2009
Just a Little FYI
Parents of children with autism quickly become authorities on the subject. But what about in-laws, teachers, coaches, and cousins? Few people outside the immediate family really want to read 20 closely-written pages from the National Institutes of Health. This brief, pithy article provides the bare bones basics for a quick read - along with links to more in-depth information for those who want to know.
1. Autism Is a 'Spectrum' DisorderPeople with autism can be a little autistic or very autistic. Thus, it is possible to be bright, verbal, and autistic as well as mentally retarded, non-verbal and autistic. A disorder that includes such a broad range of symptoms is often called a spectrum disorder; hence the term "autism spectrum disorder." The most significant shared symptom is difficulty with social communication (eye contact, conversation, taking another's perspective, etc.).
zSB(3,3)
Sponsored Links
Restoring HopeDrug Free Therapy for Autism Pfeiffer Treatment Centerwww.hriptc.org/autism_help.html
Barrington IEP AdvocateIEP, 504, and At-Risk support Call or email for a free consultwww.IEPGuardians.org
Free Grants for Autism$10,000 in Free Grants for Autism Never Repay - Get Your Free Kit NowAutism.GrantKit.org
2. Asperger Syndrome is a High Functioning Form of AutismAsperger Syndrome (AS) is considered to be a part of the autism spectrum. The only significant difference between AS and High Functioning Autism is that people with AS usually develop speech right on time while people with autism usually have speech delays. People with AS are generally very bright and verbal, but have significant social deficits (which is why AS has earned the nickname "Geek Syndrome").
3. People With Autism Are Different from One AnotherIf you've seen Rainman or a TV show about autism, you may think you know what autism "looks like." In fact, though, when you've met one person with with autism you've met ONE person with autism. Some people with autism are chatty; others are silent. Many have sensory issues, gastrointestinal problems, sleep difficulties and other medical problems. Others may have social-communication delays - and that's it.
4. There Are Dozens of Treatments for Autism - But No 'Cure'So far as medical science is aware, there is at present no cure for autism. That's not to say that people with autism don't improve, because many improve radically. But even when people with autism increase their skills, they are still autistic, which means they think and perceive differently from most people. Children with autism may receive many types of treatments. Treatments may be biomedical, sensory, behavioral, developmental or even arts-based. Depending upon the child, certain treatments will be more successful than others.
5. There Are Many Theories on the Cause of Autism, But No ConsensusYou may have seen or heard news stories about possible causes of autism. Theories range from mercury in infant vaccines to genetics to the age of the parents to almost everything else. At present, most researchers think autism is caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors - and it's quite possible that different people's symptoms have different causes.
6. People Don't Grow Out of Autism Autism is a lifelong diagnosis. For some people, often (but not always) those who receive intensive early intervention, symptoms may decrease radically. People with autism can also learn coping skills to help them manage their difficulties and even build on their unique strengths. But a person with autism will probably be autistic throughout their lives.
7. Families Coping with Autism Need Help and SupportEven "high functioning" autism is challenging for parents. "Low functioning" autism can be overwhelming to the entire family. Families may be under a great deal of stress, and they need all the non-judgemental help they can get from friends, extended family, and service providers. Respite care (someone else taking care of the person with autism while other family members take a break) can be a marriage and/or family-saver!
8. There's No 'Best School' for a Child with AutismYou may have heard of a wonderful "autism school," or read of a child doing amazingly well in a particular type of classroom setting. While any given setting may be perfect for any given child, every child with autism has unique needs. Even in an ideal world, "including" a child with autism in a typical class may not be the best choice. Decisions about autistic education are generally made by a team made up of parents, teachers, administrators and therapists who know the child well.
9. There Are Many Unfounded Myths About AutismThe media is full of stories about autism, and many of those stories are less than accurate. For example, you may have heard that people with autism are cold and unfeeling, or that people with autism never marry or hold productive jobs. Since every person with autism is different, however, such "always" and "never" statements simply don't hold water. To understand a person with autism, it's a good idea to spend some time getting to know him or her - personally!
10. Autistic People Have Many Strengths and AbilitiesIt may seem that autism is a wholly negative diagnosis. But almost everyone on the autism spectrum has a great to deal to offer the world. People with autism are among the most forthright, non-judgemental, passionate people you'll ever meet. They are also ideal candidates for many types of careers.
1. Autism Is a 'Spectrum' DisorderPeople with autism can be a little autistic or very autistic. Thus, it is possible to be bright, verbal, and autistic as well as mentally retarded, non-verbal and autistic. A disorder that includes such a broad range of symptoms is often called a spectrum disorder; hence the term "autism spectrum disorder." The most significant shared symptom is difficulty with social communication (eye contact, conversation, taking another's perspective, etc.).
zSB(3,3)
Sponsored Links
Restoring HopeDrug Free Therapy for Autism Pfeiffer Treatment Centerwww.hriptc.org/autism_help.html
Barrington IEP AdvocateIEP, 504, and At-Risk support Call or email for a free consultwww.IEPGuardians.org
Free Grants for Autism$10,000 in Free Grants for Autism Never Repay - Get Your Free Kit NowAutism.GrantKit.org
2. Asperger Syndrome is a High Functioning Form of AutismAsperger Syndrome (AS) is considered to be a part of the autism spectrum. The only significant difference between AS and High Functioning Autism is that people with AS usually develop speech right on time while people with autism usually have speech delays. People with AS are generally very bright and verbal, but have significant social deficits (which is why AS has earned the nickname "Geek Syndrome").
3. People With Autism Are Different from One AnotherIf you've seen Rainman or a TV show about autism, you may think you know what autism "looks like." In fact, though, when you've met one person with with autism you've met ONE person with autism. Some people with autism are chatty; others are silent. Many have sensory issues, gastrointestinal problems, sleep difficulties and other medical problems. Others may have social-communication delays - and that's it.
4. There Are Dozens of Treatments for Autism - But No 'Cure'So far as medical science is aware, there is at present no cure for autism. That's not to say that people with autism don't improve, because many improve radically. But even when people with autism increase their skills, they are still autistic, which means they think and perceive differently from most people. Children with autism may receive many types of treatments. Treatments may be biomedical, sensory, behavioral, developmental or even arts-based. Depending upon the child, certain treatments will be more successful than others.
5. There Are Many Theories on the Cause of Autism, But No ConsensusYou may have seen or heard news stories about possible causes of autism. Theories range from mercury in infant vaccines to genetics to the age of the parents to almost everything else. At present, most researchers think autism is caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors - and it's quite possible that different people's symptoms have different causes.
6. People Don't Grow Out of Autism Autism is a lifelong diagnosis. For some people, often (but not always) those who receive intensive early intervention, symptoms may decrease radically. People with autism can also learn coping skills to help them manage their difficulties and even build on their unique strengths. But a person with autism will probably be autistic throughout their lives.
7. Families Coping with Autism Need Help and SupportEven "high functioning" autism is challenging for parents. "Low functioning" autism can be overwhelming to the entire family. Families may be under a great deal of stress, and they need all the non-judgemental help they can get from friends, extended family, and service providers. Respite care (someone else taking care of the person with autism while other family members take a break) can be a marriage and/or family-saver!
8. There's No 'Best School' for a Child with AutismYou may have heard of a wonderful "autism school," or read of a child doing amazingly well in a particular type of classroom setting. While any given setting may be perfect for any given child, every child with autism has unique needs. Even in an ideal world, "including" a child with autism in a typical class may not be the best choice. Decisions about autistic education are generally made by a team made up of parents, teachers, administrators and therapists who know the child well.
9. There Are Many Unfounded Myths About AutismThe media is full of stories about autism, and many of those stories are less than accurate. For example, you may have heard that people with autism are cold and unfeeling, or that people with autism never marry or hold productive jobs. Since every person with autism is different, however, such "always" and "never" statements simply don't hold water. To understand a person with autism, it's a good idea to spend some time getting to know him or her - personally!
10. Autistic People Have Many Strengths and AbilitiesIt may seem that autism is a wholly negative diagnosis. But almost everyone on the autism spectrum has a great to deal to offer the world. People with autism are among the most forthright, non-judgemental, passionate people you'll ever meet. They are also ideal candidates for many types of careers.
Sunday, February 08, 2009
Special Olympics weekend
Sal was better on Friday night and begged to go to basketball on Saturday. We got up at insane o'clock and got to Oak Lawn by 7:30 a.m. As they started to warm up Sal started crying. The coaches weren't there and a parent had taken over at the basket and had evidently said something to Sal. Ohhhhh - we WILL have words about *that*. So when the coaches walked in Sal was ALL smiles. We lost the first game by one point. God, they played well! The other team had absolutely no visible handicaps - nothing like our team - but we stayed within 2 points of them the whole game!
The second game wasn't as close and it was a team we had beaten before. I think we were all tired and just not into playing. Our guys are so much more physically handicapped then a lot of teams - but they did well, really well.
Our last game was at 11:30 and then we headed home. Because there aren't enough teams from this area - our team has been invited to the Special Olympics in Bloomington in March. Bill and I are both vacillating on if we want to go or not.
Saturday night Bill and Sal went out to a daddy/daughter dance. We had to talk pretty hard to get Sal into a nice pair of slacks and shirt and then I put her necklace on that she got from Susie in remembrance of "her" Sally. But she looked SO nice. She even let me curl her hair. Bill said they had a really nice time and Sally danced with him and had a great time. Plus her buddy Liv was there with Uncle Eric. So she had a really fun evening.
Jack - not so much. Man, he's a booger sometimes. I realize now we should have planned something for me and him to do - like a movie or something. But that boy sure can suck the fun right out of life. He'll be lucky to live till his next birthday, the way he's going lately.
The second game wasn't as close and it was a team we had beaten before. I think we were all tired and just not into playing. Our guys are so much more physically handicapped then a lot of teams - but they did well, really well.
Our last game was at 11:30 and then we headed home. Because there aren't enough teams from this area - our team has been invited to the Special Olympics in Bloomington in March. Bill and I are both vacillating on if we want to go or not.
Saturday night Bill and Sal went out to a daddy/daughter dance. We had to talk pretty hard to get Sal into a nice pair of slacks and shirt and then I put her necklace on that she got from Susie in remembrance of "her" Sally. But she looked SO nice. She even let me curl her hair. Bill said they had a really nice time and Sally danced with him and had a great time. Plus her buddy Liv was there with Uncle Eric. So she had a really fun evening.
Jack - not so much. Man, he's a booger sometimes. I realize now we should have planned something for me and him to do - like a movie or something. But that boy sure can suck the fun right out of life. He'll be lucky to live till his next birthday, the way he's going lately.
Friday, February 06, 2009
Autism comes RAGING in!
I forget. No, I don't forget - how could I forget - but I seem to go on auto-pilot and take too much stuff at face value. After some investigation last night I have a new understanding of Sal's toilet habits. The new info is what STARTS the problem - and that is neurologically, her muscles have problems with elimination - which in turn makes a painful experience in the bathroom which THEN starts the whole cycle. Dr never talked about the BRAIN part. Soooooooooo, taking her off the meds when "things" were working was BAD. So we have a pretty big problem to fix. At least I know once we get this last episode over with we need to ALWAYS give the meds. It's not a question of not wanting to go with her - at first - it's the brain. And I guess the thing that ticks me off is that I should have realized this before. Sal is the most ALL-AROUND eater I know. She loves vegetables, she doesn't eat THAT much junk, really - not like the boy -It always puzzled me why this kept happening to her. So NOW I have the answer. That going back in time stuff would be WONDERFUL, huh? ;-)
So little Miss Sal is home with Daddy again. Talking to Gma and Gpa this morning Gpa told me that he was going to call DCFS because he had heard that I was "always ruining lives" ;-) That Jack provides more entertainment for my family. They had had heard from Jackie who really enjoyed the basketball game. (Sal's)
Sal plays tomorrow in a tourney at "insane o'clock" and I'm hoping she can participate in it. It's the starting of the Spec Olympics and the team who does well here then moves up and I'd like her to be part of that. Plus, when one is missing the others are anxious about it - even if that one doesn't do anything but "screen". :-) Not to mention that the physical activity will help our whole problem also.
One thing that was recommended to me by one of my Autism moms was to start the day with something warm with the meds. It seems to "wake up" the bowels. The only thing is - Sal doesn't care for warm things. Maybe it's time for us to have a "tea party" in the morning. :-)
I think even Jack would go for that - as long as it include waffles. That seems to be his staple food lately.
Jack Jack is doing well not being in the spotlight since Sal's sick. I got to see him in action on Tuesday - it was Muffins for Moms at school and after consuming our obligatory muffin the kids escorted us to their rooms. Jack immediately took up with M (who is similar to Sal) and I got to see how well he treats M. I was SO proud of him and very touched. Mrs G confided that Jack is the ring leader of the room and makes sure the M is seen to. We've had several kids who have helped Sal along the way: Q, B, and now D and it's so nice to see Jack respond in kind. I know much those kids mean to me that help Sal and I think M's mom feels that way about Jack. She knew him by name and chatted with him and M before she left. So when the boy lands in jail for doing some ridiculous thing I need to remind myself of the time that he was an asset to the community. :-)
So little Miss Sal is home with Daddy again. Talking to Gma and Gpa this morning Gpa told me that he was going to call DCFS because he had heard that I was "always ruining lives" ;-) That Jack provides more entertainment for my family. They had had heard from Jackie who really enjoyed the basketball game. (Sal's)
Sal plays tomorrow in a tourney at "insane o'clock" and I'm hoping she can participate in it. It's the starting of the Spec Olympics and the team who does well here then moves up and I'd like her to be part of that. Plus, when one is missing the others are anxious about it - even if that one doesn't do anything but "screen". :-) Not to mention that the physical activity will help our whole problem also.
One thing that was recommended to me by one of my Autism moms was to start the day with something warm with the meds. It seems to "wake up" the bowels. The only thing is - Sal doesn't care for warm things. Maybe it's time for us to have a "tea party" in the morning. :-)
I think even Jack would go for that - as long as it include waffles. That seems to be his staple food lately.
Jack Jack is doing well not being in the spotlight since Sal's sick. I got to see him in action on Tuesday - it was Muffins for Moms at school and after consuming our obligatory muffin the kids escorted us to their rooms. Jack immediately took up with M (who is similar to Sal) and I got to see how well he treats M. I was SO proud of him and very touched. Mrs G confided that Jack is the ring leader of the room and makes sure the M is seen to. We've had several kids who have helped Sal along the way: Q, B, and now D and it's so nice to see Jack respond in kind. I know much those kids mean to me that help Sal and I think M's mom feels that way about Jack. She knew him by name and chatted with him and M before she left. So when the boy lands in jail for doing some ridiculous thing I need to remind myself of the time that he was an asset to the community. :-)
Thursday, February 05, 2009
No School For Her
Oh, Sal was upset this morning. She seems to be "bound up" and just "not right" since last night and I decided that since Dad was home with pulled muscle that she should stay too. She was a *little* upset but soon was over it and that reinforced my opinion that she's just not well. If she was, she would have fought me tooth and nail.
So I left her in Daddy's care this morning, which she wasn't *too* sure about and gave me that "I'll try and be brave look" that she's so good at and Jack told me,"Mom, she doesn't want you to leave." He seems to have a *little* intuition also - but he, as most men totally ignores it usually. ;-)
Bill went to his "lotto" meeting last night and rec'd #5 (out of 10) on the ballot. He obviously didn't talk to Sal the wishing wizard beforehand. :-) His head was spinning when he got home about all the new info he had rec'd.
So I left her in Daddy's care this morning, which she wasn't *too* sure about and gave me that "I'll try and be brave look" that she's so good at and Jack told me,"Mom, she doesn't want you to leave." He seems to have a *little* intuition also - but he, as most men totally ignores it usually. ;-)
Bill went to his "lotto" meeting last night and rec'd #5 (out of 10) on the ballot. He obviously didn't talk to Sal the wishing wizard beforehand. :-) His head was spinning when he got home about all the new info he had rec'd.
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
Sometimes I have to laugh
Last night as Jack was in the tub - Mabel overturned the dirty clothes hamper. As I set it back up I said weakly "Mabel, Mabel, Mabel"
Jack says "I know, you hate her don't you?"
"No honey, I don't hate her, she just drives me crazy sometimes, I always have to make sure she's not doing something naughty."
"Yeah, she's just like Sally."
I went into the bathroom to see him eye to eye when he explained how Mabel was like Sally because really Mabel is a four footed Jack.
Sitting in the tub, facing me he raised his hands and shrugged his shoulders and said "You know, she's just like *Autistic*."
Jack says "I know, you hate her don't you?"
"No honey, I don't hate her, she just drives me crazy sometimes, I always have to make sure she's not doing something naughty."
"Yeah, she's just like Sally."
I went into the bathroom to see him eye to eye when he explained how Mabel was like Sally because really Mabel is a four footed Jack.
Sitting in the tub, facing me he raised his hands and shrugged his shoulders and said "You know, she's just like *Autistic*."
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