I had to re post this because I need the lesson again. I am daily surrounded by SO many people that not only accept S but seek her out so when confronted with people who shun her I'm surprised. The look you get is SO unbelievable. And when it happens I find myself getting almost ballsie about it - just daring them to say something.
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Sunday
"You Are Understanding:Maybe you never realized how important it is to have a truly understanding friend until you had a child with special needs, and found so many friends to be unable to reach out and give you the support you needed.Whether they couldn't deal with your changed circumstances, sympathize with your problems, keep from hurtful judging, or allow you child to associate with theirs,some of the people who were once important in your life may have fallen away because at the deepest level, they were unable to understand.It's made you value those who are always there for you, unconditionally, without agenda. And it's helped you to be much more understanding parent, family member and friend yourself."
Terri Mauro
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Oh, sing it loud and proud, Sistah!!!!!!! YES, many people have fallen by the wayside and mostly it was their choice. And what's sad - they don't know what they're missing. She is a true joy. I learn stuff from her every day of my life. Yes, it's a struggle and life is harder than I ever imagined, but it's also better than I ever imagined. The people who HAVE stuck or been added: Topping the list -- L. I don't know what I would do without her. She is the friend they speak about above. She treats S just like she would anyone else. She loves me unconditionally. We have had our growing pains but we have made it through a lot! I know that if I call her she will put me back on the right track. I value her so much. She has always been in my cheering section and always pumped me up when I needed it. I so wish she could see herself through my eyes. She is a VERY special person.My sister has also been a guiding force in my life. She also sees no difference in S. She has imparted wisdom of years and relationships. She has also made me laugh along the way and provided a very much needed refuge to escape and dial down. I value her more than she knows or will admit. :-)My cyber friends have both entertained, informed me and let me vent. We've been in space for over 10 years now. I value them because they incorporate so MANY walks of life. When we started we had "only October in common" and now we have SO much more. What I find most interesting about the relationships that have been lost along the way, they were never positive ones. It's taken (still is) me a LONG time to realize that no matter what I did - it wasn't going to work out and in reality I didn't want the prize. How many years have I been in that same mess, just different faces. And what's worse - realizing all the energy that was lost on stuff that really didn't matter and wasn't going to make a difference. Energy I could have used to do other things. But you live, you learn, hopefully. :-)
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Well, I'm STILL learning this lesson. I have to say - on some things I'm very *thick*. I do the same thing over and over and over. Never *really* learning. So I question - exactly WHO has the learning disability??????
S went to social club today - out to DesPlaines. Had a GREAT time! As soon as she was back she was off to Connie's birthday party down the street. The two didn't get home till around 8:30!
We started the day off (and MOST of the rest of the day) with NO air conditioning!!!! It is the most humid and hot day we've had yet and with no air there was really nothing to do but lay around all day. B fixed the air - thank God -it's now BEAUTIFUL here!
So tomorrow I get to do all the chores I was supposed to do today. Woo hoo.
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